*DATE* The Misleading Lesbian

My third meeting almost didn’t happen because I had great difficulty identifying my date. Charlie* contacted me using the email address that I gave in my initial post (virginstudent69@yahoo.co.uk) and failed to mention that she wasn’t a man. Maybe I shouldn’t have assumed that just because somebody was interested in dating me they were male but I was shocked when I found out the price of my jumping to conclusions. I suppose the misunderstanding was partly based on the fact that I didn’t realise just how many lesbians are out there and partly because I assumed that it was the male species that were more likely to be taken in by an advert to help a girl lose her virginity. So the fact that Charlie was a female when I was looking for a male meant that when I entered Border’s coffee shop and saw that there were no men sitting alone, I assumed I’d been stood up until she came over and introduced herself. I could tell from the way she wasn’t at all embarrassed when I explained that I wasn’t expecting a girl, that she already knew that and I felt a little irritated that she’d deliberately allowed such a thing to happen.
Charlie was stunning and not at all boyish. She’s the only lesbian I’ve ever seen without really broad shoulders. She did have short hair but she had a great bone structure so she looked very feminine and delicate. At first (partly due to some OxRom members warning me about the potential to attract media attention) I was afraid that she might be a reporter from the Cherwell or something but it turned out that she really was a lesbian and hoping to be a candidate for my first time. She was so attractive that I’m sure if I was that way inclined then I would have fancied her but I’m not so I didn’t. It’s not that I have anything against lesbians, it’s just that I’m not one. Also, I want to lose my virginity properly, not with a woman. I tried to explain this to Charlie and she seemed very offended. She kept insisting that lesbian sex is real sex but how can it be? I mean girls just don’t have the necessary equipment do they? After I relayed my views on the subject the conversation seemed to have adopt an icy feel and I was glad when the date was over. I’ve never drunk coffee so fast. I burnt my tongue.

Current Exclusion Criteria:
-married men
-people who list more than 2 insecurities during any 5 minute period
-people who feel they need to take consecutive showers in order to be truly clean
-people who can’t judge the right and wrong moments to start a kiss
-women
-people who don’t reveal their gender before the date